Monday, July 13, 2009

Editting the Last Logan

Starting today I'm using this to track - and motivate myself - on my progress. This is my third book, and I'm editing like crazy but getting nowhere. Part of the problem - it's a romantic suspense that wasn't suspenseful enough. So I added three new characters, two victims and a red herring to divert attention from my real villain.

Today I'm working on a scene between the hero and that rat bastard father of his. The father and his older brother had our hero framed for a murder and he's spent ten years in prison. During that time the heroine has suffered, even though his relatives promised him that in return for his compliance she would be protected. He'd returned to threaten his father if he doesn't stop harassing her. There's nothing he can do about the past, but now that he's back he's going to make things as right as possible - even if she hates him because she thinks he abandoned her. eleven pages, over 2000 words. Done, thank God.

Tomorrow's scene - his father's mistress is accused of being unfaithful, she's failed the paternity test and being thrown out. he tries to stand up for her. I'm also hoping to squeeze a meeting in between the hero and his cousin, my secret villain.

Just for kicks, here's a sample from today's edit:

William had laughed. “Son of a bitch. You actually had the balls to fuck with me on your own. Stupid-assed move, but still, I never thought you’d have the guts.”
Gary tried to plead for Kyle. “He shouldn’t have done it, but … come on Willie, he’s your brother.”
Mitchell Logan slammed a fist on his desk. “I told you to give that slut up.”
“She’s not a slut,” Kyle said.
William laughed again. “She fucked you, didn’t she?”
Kyle’s fist slammed into William’s face.

William would not have killed him for that. Not when he knew a better way to hurt his brother. Mitchell had promised to shield Beverly from William’s wrath, and Kyle had agreed to follow orders.
The ultimatum William presented had been deceptively simple. Agree to leave and work for him at the Logan Enterprises branch in southern Texas. William was only twenty five but he already moved in a world of violence. His enemies populated hospital emergency room and morgues. Or disappeared without a trace.
“Did you know what William intended for me?”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Don’t lie.”
Mitchell laughed before moving to the bar along one wall and pouring himself a drink. “Want one?”
“No real Logan ever refuses a drink.”
What real father sends his son to rot in prison? “Did you know?”
Mitchell tossed back the drink and poured another. “You stole from your brother. He had a right to pick the punishment.”

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